Selasa, 31 Januari 2012

Frankly, I Don't Give a Damn!


Frankly, traditional publishers, I don't give a damn! If I die not selling another book, you can rest assured that using a POD (Print On Demand) publisher is light years ahead of trying to get a pompous, élite, self-serving, holier than thou, snobbish, dinosaur ass, traditional publisher to even open your manuscript envelope, let alone read it. I have heard that they have huge trash cans for unopened manuscript envelopes and use them to stay warm in the winter, which is impossible considering they are reptilian.

I have lost count of the horror stories concerning newbie writers being treated like sub humans at the hands of traditional publishers. Worse yet, if you were one of the very fortunate writers able to get signed by one of these publishing houses, your status went from subhuman to slave. Forget keeping the content of your novel, it will be tweaked into oblivion. Not to worry though; the odds of getting published are worse than winning the lottery!

Did I send my manuscript to some traditional publishers? Yes. But, after wasting about fifty bucks on postage, I decided it would be cheaper in the long run to hire a POD publisher. After much research and a little luck, I found the perfect publisher, Wheatmark, Inc.

Here is the gist of an e-mail I received today from Wheatmark:

“We received your Proof Approval Form and have released your files to the printer. You will receive your Author Sample Copies in about a week from today.”

In other words, my sequel murder mystery, Day Stalker, has gone to press!

That’s what I’m talking about…. While some newbie authors are waiting for word on manuscripts that will never come, I just had my second novel published. I am already working on the third novel, The Phoenix Code, anticipating finishing the trilogy in May.

What are you waiting for? Get your books started; a great adventure waits!

Write on,

Mittster

Senin, 30 Januari 2012

Monday

Monday, Monday…how do I love thee? Let me count the ways. NO ways!


If I were to get Monday a Valentine’s gift, it would be pig poop in a plastic bag.


I know, let’s wrap Monday to a tree with duct tape and pee on it all day.

How about this? We pour cement overshoes on Monday and bury it in the desert. The concrete is to make sure the coyotes can’t drag it off!


I’m wondering if the rack might convince Monday to never appear again.
Sorry, wrong rack....


Where is Godzilla when you need him? He could have Monday for breakfast.


I thought about simply erasing Monday from the calendar, but Tuesday would just take its place! Even naming the days after numbers wouldn’t work. Two would just take over for one.


We could send Monday to Mars on a rocket, but if there is life there it would be so rude.


We could nuke it, but that would kill the rest of the week and us too.


OK, I get it Monday is here to stay, but I don’t have to like it. Let’s just get on with the day and before we know it, Tuesday will be here and we can look forward to Friday. God, I love Fridays – let me count the ways….

I’m just saying,

Mittster

Sabtu, 28 Januari 2012




Menampilkan space iklan di blog memberi peluang & informasi pada advertiser bahwa blog tersebut menawarkan space iklan yg dapat disewa. Apalagi jika blog tersebut memiliki kredibilitas, rank, serta traffic tinggi, maka advertiser/pemasang iklan pasti akan...


Jumat, 27 Januari 2012

Smile, it becomes you

“If you yelled for 8 years, 7 months and 6 days you would have produced enough sound energy to heat one cup of coffee.
(Hardly seems worth it.)


If you farted consistently for 6 years and 9 months, enough gas is produced to create the energy of an atomic bomb.
(Now that's more like it!)


The human heart creates enough pressure when it pumps out to the body to squirt blood 30 feet.
(O.M.G.!)


A pig's orgasm lasts 30 minutes.
(O.M.G.!!!)


A cockroach will live nine days without its head before it starves to death. (Creepy)
(I'm still not over the pig.)


Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories an hour.
(Don't try this at home; maybe at work.)


The male praying mantis cannot copulate while its head is attached to its body. The female initiates sex by ripping the male's head off.
(Honey, I'm home . WTF...?)


The flea can jump 350 times its body length. It's like a human jumping the length of a football field.
(30 minutes. Lucky pig! Can you imagine?)


The catfish has over 27,000 taste buds.
(What could be so tasty on the bottom of a pond?)


Some lions mate over 50 times a day.
(I still can't believe that pig ...quality over quantity.)


Butterflies taste with their feet.
(Something I always wanted to know.)


The strongest muscle in the body is the tongue.
(Hmmmmmm.......)


Right-handed people live, on average, nine years longer than left-handed people.
(If you're ambidextrous, do you split the difference?)


Elephants are the only animals that cannot jump.
(Okay, so that would be a good thing.)


A cat's urine glows under a black light.
(I wonder how much the government paid to figure that out.)


An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.
(I know some people like that.)


Starfish have no brains.
(I know some people like that, too.)


Polar bears are left-handed.
(If they switch, they'll live a lot longer.)

Humans and dolphins are the only species that have sex for pleasure.
(What about that pig? Do the dolphins know about the pig? God I love that pig!)”

Write on,

Mittster

Kamis, 26 Januari 2012

Hanoi Jane

The story of Hanoi Jane Fonda is not new, but seems to be forgoten. The following piece was written and posted on the Internet. I felt obliged to make it a blog. It is not proofed or edited because the words as stated are fact and need no explaination. Click on the title of this blog to see the truth about Hanoi Jane. Mittster


Regardless of this woman's acting prowess (or family line) - she really is caustic.. PEOPLE GOTTA KNOW......................

I am sending this one out because so many do not know this truth...
and also because she was on TV 3 times this week talking about her new book...and how good she feels in her 70's. She still does not know what she did wrong. Her book just may not make the best list if more people knew....
also, Barbara Walters said: "Thank you all. Many died in Vietnam for our freedoms. I did not like Jane Fonda then and I don't like her now.
She can lead her present life the way she wants and perhaps SHE can forget the past, but we DO NOT have to stand by without comment and see her "honored" as a "Woman of the Century."
(I remember this well)
For those who served and/or died. . .
NEVER FORGIVE A TRAITOR. SHE REALLY WAS A TRAITOR!!
and now President OBAMA wants to honor her!!!!"


In Memory of LT. C.Thomsen Wieland who spent 100 days at the Hanoi Hilton [Famous North Vietnam Prison]
IF YOU NEVER FORWARDED ANYTHING IN YOUR LIFE FORWARD THIS SO THAT EVERYONE WILL KNOW!!!!!!
A TRAITOR IS ABOUT TO BE HONORED.
KEEP THIS MOVING ACROSS AMERICA
This is for all the kids born in the 70's and after who do not remember, and didn't have to bear the burden that our fathers, mothers and older brothers and sisters had to bear.
Jane Fonda is being honored as one of the '100 Women of the Century.'


BARBRA WALTERS WRITES:
Unfortunately, many have forgotten and still countless others have never known how Ms. Fonda betrayed not only the idea of our country, but specific men who served and sacrificed during the Vietnam War.
The first part of this is from an F-4E pilot.
The pilot's name is Jerry Driscoll, a River Rat.
In 1968, the former Commandant of the USAF Survival School was a POW in Ho Lo Prison the ' Hanoi Hilton.'
Dragged from a stinking cesspit of a cell, cleaned, fed, and dressed in clean PJ's, he was ordered to describe for a visiting American 'Peace Activist' the 'lenient and humane treatment' he'd received.
He spat at Ms. Fonda, was clubbed, and was dragged away. During the subsequent beating, he fell forward on to the camp Commandant 's feet, which sent that officer berserk.
In 1978, the Air Force Colonel still suffered from double vision (which permanently ended his flying career) from the Commandant's frenzied application of a wooden baton.


From 1963-65, Col. Larry Carrigan was in the 47FW/DO (F-4E's). He spent 6 years in the ' Hanoi Hilton'...the first three of which his family only knew he was 'missing in action'. His wife lived on faith that he was still alive. His group, too, got the cleaned-up, fed and clothed routine in preparation for a 'peace delegation' visit.
They, however, had time and devised a plan to get word to the world that they were alive and still survived. Each man secreted a tiny piece of paper, with his Social Security Number on it, in the palm of his hand. When paraded before Ms. Fonda and a cameraman, she walked the line, shaking each man's hand and asking little encouraging snippets like: 'Aren't you sorry you bombed babies?' and 'Are you grateful for the humane treatment from your benevolent captors?' Believing this HAD to be an act, they each palmed her their sliver of paper.
She took them all without missing a beat.. At the end of the line and once the camera stopped rolling, to the shocked disbelief of the POWs, she turned to the officer in charge and handed him all the little pieces of paper...


Three men died from the subsequent beatings. Colonel Carrigan was almost number four but he survived, which is the only reason we know of her actions that day.


I was a civilian economic development advisor in Vietnam , and was captured by the North Vietnamese communists in South Vietnam in 1968, and held prisoner for over 5 years.
I spent 27 months in solitary confinement; one year in a cage in Cambodia ; and one year in a 'black box' in Hanoi . My North Vietnamese captors deliberately poisoned and murdered a female missionary, a nurse in a leprosarium in Banme Thuot , South Vietnam , whom I buried in the jungle near the Cambodian border. At one time, I weighed only about 90 lbs. (My normal weight is 170 lbs)
We were Jane Fonda's 'war criminals....'
When Jane Fonda was in Hanoi , I was asked by the camp communist political officer if I would be willing to meet with her. I said yes, for I wanted to tell her about the real treatment we POWs received... and how different it was from the treatment purported by the North Vietnamese, and parroted by her as 'humane and lenient.'
Because of this, I spent three days on a rocky floor on my knees, with my arms outstretched with a large steel weight placed on my hands, and beaten with a bamboo cane.
I had the opportunity to meet with Jane Fonda soon after I was released. I asked her if she would be willing to debate me on TV. She never did answer me.


These first-hand experiences do not exemplify someone who should be honored as part of '100 Years of Great Women.' Lest we forget....' 100 Years of Great Women' should never include a traitor whose hands are covered with the blood of so many patriots.


There are few things I have strong visceral reactions to, but Hanoi Jane's participation in blatant treason, is one of them. Please take the time to forward to as many people as you possibly can.. It will eventually end up on her computer and she needs to know that we will never forget.
RONALD D. SAMPSON, CMSgt,
USAF 716 Maintenance Squadron,
Chief of Maintenance DSN: 875-6431 COMM: 883-6343

Rabu, 25 Januari 2012

Old is Gold


I am sick and tired of old people jokes. I happen to be 69 years old and this is my best year yet. Besides, I can't go back and if I could, I would just screw up at a different level.

Here is the real deal. When you reach my age you can do pretty much as you please. I don't worry about my hair or lack of. I don't worry about looks (if you don't like what you see – don’t look. It won’t hurt either of our feelings.) I can actually gaze at young women because I have learned not to gawk and I appreciate beauty without it being dirty. You won’t find me with a woman 30 years my junior because I have too much respect for women. Besides, who wants to go out with their grandfather? Everyone would be embarrassed!


The best thing I ever did was quit drinking. Those days were filled with me thinking women adored drunk guys and wanted us to jump their bones while reeking of booze and not able to find anyone's ass with both hands. Reality dictated that the women would leave in disgust and I would wake up retching in the golden throne promising never to do it again.

Man slut

I believe there is some truth in the saying that getting older is like the aging process of fine wine. The whole process is based on how you store the bottle. It’s the same with humans – if you don’t take care of the container, what is inside turns to vinegar. That’s why some older folks you meet are sour, resentful and spiteful. They are miserable and want everyone around them to be the same. I, for one, refuse to go there. Maybe that is why I still ride Harleys and smile a lot. I want people to be happy and appreciate the things they do have instead of always wishing for the things they think they need and don’t have. Once you learn to be happy with what you have and who you are, the other things don’t seem as important anymore.


I don’t know how many years I have left on this beautiful blue planet, but I do know each and every minute will be enjoyed. For those who think old people suck…go suck an egg. I want to hang out with people who are alive, happy with their lives, love animals, and are willing to help others in times of need.


“I don’t need no stinking sourpusses!”

I’m just saying,

Mittster

Selasa, 24 Januari 2012

"I will fight no more forever."

Chief Joseph

You might ask why the Mittster is going off on a tirade about Indian treaties and wars. Actually I am not; the tirade is going to be about our Republican Party and how the whole sorted mess makes me think that I am not going to fight about who should be running against President Obama no more forever. In fact, I want to go live on a reservation somewhere that is lacking in electricity, radio, television or any manner of communications.

President Obama is watching this fiasco with a grin ear to ear while counting the money he will not have to spend getting reelected. The Republican Party has already reelected the current President hands down. It’s just a matter of the Democrats waiting out the rest of the Republican Party comedy act until the November general elections.


I hate writing blogs about politics, but how can I not say something about the cartoon characters debating each other on national television while each and every time proving we don’t have anyone worth electing to the town council of Po Dunk, Idaho, let alone to the Presidency of the United States of America.

President Barack Obama

While I have been a lifetime Republican, I cannot help but marvel at the professionalism of President Barack Obama. Everything he does and says speaks presidential. I may not like his politics, but I like the man. Let’s face it, he projects the kind of professionalism needed to gain the respect of world leaders who look to us for leadership. For those leaders who do not look to us for anything but grief, Donald Trump could be president and they wouldn’t care. Speaking of "The Donald," I truly think he is a worthy Republican opponent compared to the current field of want-to-be presidents. If you are going to act cartoonish, at least look the part.

Donald Trump

Just for giggles (because I don’t want to cry), I here and now throw in Clint Eastwood’s name as a write-in Republican candidate.

Clint Eastwood

He looks presidential, has some political experience, and is tough as nails. If I could do just half of what he accomplishes daily at his age, I would be more than satisfied. One thing is for sure, if any of the other candidates give him any crap at the next debate, he would look down at them and say, “Make my day!” Glory be – that would be a sight to behold.

I’m just saying,

Mittster