Minggu, 27 Februari 2011

Star Trek Phones

My wife recently purchased a new fangled cell phone that enables her to go on line, receive text messages, and about a hundred other functions. She actually has learned quite a bit about the phone and manages to keep in touch through texting. She even gets the weather reports while we are traveling. These phones are a marvel of technology and even though my wife was worried about all the functions, she is starting to master the art of using her intergalactic communicator. There is only one problem; you can’t control the idiots on the other end of the signal.

While returning home from Quartzsite, Arizona, yesterday, wifey received a text signal. “Oh great, I bet it’s Chris from Michigan!” she exclaimed. “I bet he is buried up to his butt in snow,” was my reply. As my wife pushed buttons and changed screens with a swish of her finger, a perplexed look came over her face. “I don’t believe this; the message reads, ‘Hey, who is this?’” she announced. I remarked, “Ask them, who in the hell are you?” She typed in, “Who are you?” While we were waiting for an answer, I was thinking, don’t you just hate it when someone calls you and asks who is this? I always reply, “This is me, who are you?”

After a minute or so, the phone again announced that another text message had arrived. It read, “I have your number in my phone, but no name. I need to know your name and what state you’re in.” “That’s enough of that,” my wife said to me as she put her phone back in her purse.

After a couple of minutes passed and we were discussing the virtues of not being an idiot like the person texting us, the phone rang again. With trepidation, my wife retrieved her phone and read the following text. “Are you the Simpsons from Houston, Texas?” Now under normal circumstances, that may be a valid question. But, consider this; the caller had a 928-301 number, which is a cell phone from the Verde Valley, Arizona, area, and the call was sent to our 928-821 number, which is also a Verde Valley, Arizona, cell number. How can this idiot not know we are from Arizona and what has Houston, Texas got to do with anything? The answer is simple; you can’t fix stupid!

I’m just saying,


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